Your Child Is the Product: What Parents Need to Know About Apps and Social Media

There's an old saying in tech: if you're not paying for the product, you are the product.

For children using social media and "free" games, this isn't just a clever observation. It's a warning.

Two Sides of the Same Coin

When we look at the risks children face online, social media and mobile gaming might seem like separate concerns. One is about communication and content; the other is about spending money. But dig deeper, and you'll find they share something fundamental: both are engineered by people who understand psychology better than most parents understand their children.

Social media platforms employ teams of behavioral scientists to maximize engagement. Every notification, every infinite scroll, every "your friend just posted" alert is designed to trigger dopamine responses and keep users coming back. For adults, this is annoying. For children whose brains are still developing impulse control, it can be genuinely harmful. A Gallup survey found that 51% of US teens spend at least four hours per day on social media apps, with the average reaching 4.8 hours daily.

Free-to-play games use the same playbook, but the goal is different. Instead of selling your child's attention to advertisers, they're extracting money directly. Virtual currencies obscure real costs. Limited-time offers create artificial urgency. Loot boxes trigger the same psychological responses as gambling—and the research confirms this. A large-scale study of 16- to 18-year-olds found a link between loot box spending and problem gambling that was stronger than relationships previously observed in adults. According to the UK Gambling Commission, 40% of children who play video games have opened loot boxes.

The Numbers Are Sobering

The scale of this problem is staggering:

Social media usage among children:

64% of children under 13 report using social media, despite most platforms requiring users to be at least 13
According to Statista, 68% of US pre-teens (ages 8-12) use social media applications
Under-13 users have an average of 3.38 social media accounts
Only 18% of parents with children under 10 on Facebook are actually "friends" with their child on the platform

In-app purchase spending:

31% of parents report their children have made digital purchases without permission, costing an average of $170
41% of children have made in-app purchases without parental knowledge
67% of parents worry their kids are spending too much on in-game purchases
The freemium model now generates $92 billion annually in mobile game revenue, with 77% coming from in-app purchases

This isn't about bad parenting. It's about an information asymmetry. Tech companies invest enormous resources into understanding and influencing behavior. Parents are expected to counter these tactics with... what, exactly? Intuition?

The Parental Oversight Gap

Here's what makes this particularly challenging: most parents didn't grow up with these platforms. The tactics being used on children today simply didn't exist a generation ago.

And the data shows parents are struggling to keep up:

One in six parents (17%) whose child uses social media apps aren't using any parental controls
39% of parents say it's too time-consuming to monitor their child's social media use
32% of parents report that children find ways to get around parental controls
23% of parents rarely or never check their child's debit or credit card activity

Meanwhile, the consequences can be severe. In extreme cases, children have made thousands of dollars in unauthorized purchases—one six-year-old reportedly spent $16,000.

What Actually Helps

The good news is that every major platform now offers parental controls. The bad news is that most parents don't know they exist, or how to use them effectively.

For social media:

Instagram Supervision lets parents see who their teen follows, how much time they spend, and who they interact with
TikTok Family Pairing provides screen time controls, content filtering, and message restrictions
Snapchat Family Center and Discord safety settings offer similar oversight capabilities

For in-app purchases:

Every platform (iOS, Android, Xbox, PlayStation, Nintendo) allows parents to require authentication for purchases or disable them entirely
The "gift card strategy"—loading a fixed amount rather than linking a credit card—teaches budgeting while preventing surprise bills
Removing stored payment methods eliminates the risk of accidental purchases

But here's the thing: tools alone aren't enough. The platforms are constantly evolving their tactics. What parents really need is understanding—knowing why these platforms work the way they do, and how to have ongoing conversations with their children about navigating them safely.

Introducing Two New Courses

This is why we've added two new courses to Firewall Academy's parental controls curriculum:

Parental Controls - Social Media Safety covers the major platforms your children are likely using: Instagram, TikTok, Snapchat, and Discord. It explains why age requirements exist (and how easily they're bypassed), walks through supervision and safety features for each platform, and provides frameworks for ongoing conversations about online safety.

Parental Controls - In-App Purchases demystifies the psychology behind "free" games—from virtual currencies and loot boxes to subscription traps. It covers platform-specific spending controls and introduces strategies like gift card budgeting that turn potential problems into teaching moments.

Both courses are now available on Firewall Academy for organizations that want to support employees in their roles as parents—not just as workers.

Why This Matters for Organizations

You might wonder why a security awareness platform offers parental controls training. The answer is simple: the same employees you're training to recognize phishing attacks go home to children who are being targeted by equally sophisticated manipulation tactics.

Supporting employees as whole people—including their responsibilities as parents—builds loyalty and demonstrates that your organization's values extend beyond the office. And frankly, an employee distracted by a child's unexpected gaming bill or worried about their teen's online interactions isn't fully present at work anyway.

Digital literacy is a family affair. We think employers have a role to play in making it accessible.

These courses are available now on Firewall Academy. Sign up to explore our full parental controls curriculum, or schedule a demo to see how we can support your organization.